November 12th, 2003

I know more than you do

hullo, what's this, then?

two of my first attempts at animated gifs.
that white in the maruchan logo has got to go.

November 12th, 2003

History of Synthetic Grass or Astroturf: “James M. Faria and Robert T. Wright of Monsanto Industries co-invented Astroturf (U.S. patent #3332828). A patent for astroturf was filed for on December 25, 1965 and issued by the USPTO on July 25, 1967.”

The Turf Outlet – Your source for Artificial or Synthetic Turf Grass: “Call today — 1-800-410-8881 —  for a no obligation consultation and free estimate on smaller than stadium-size sections. Our Turf Outlet representatives are standing by to help you choose the right turf for your needs.”

and a cryptic reference to Matthew Barney’s Cremaster 1.

November 12th, 2003

Baghdad rumors–of XRAY VISION and alien assistance!

“As always, Baghdad continues to seethe with rumors and urban legends.

‘As a U.S. soldier peered out of a passing tank, a young engineering student and a retired accountant contemplated one of the more common questions on the streets of Baghdad: Did the soldier’s wraparound sunglasses give him X-ray vision?’

”With those sunglasses, he can definitely see through women’s clothes,’ said the engineering student, Samer Hamid. ‘It makes me angry. We are afraid to take our families out on the street.”

‘The retired accountant, Hekmet Tinber Hassan, smiled and said it was a baseless rumor, just like the widespread story that Saddam Hussein had been secretly working for America and was now at a CIA safe house.’ ”I do not believe Saddam is in America,’ Hassan said, ‘I heard he went to Tel Aviv.” ‘In the urban legends flourishing in Baghdad, the soldiers triumphed thanks to Saddam’s treachery and to U.S. technology. The legend about the X-ray sunglasses might have evolved from reports about the soldiers’ night- vision goggles, or maybe just from the imposing Terminator image of the soldiers.’

‘Compared with the (Iraqi) residents, who cope with the 120-degree heat by staying in the shade and dressing in light clothes and sandals, the soldiers have the look of robotic aliens as they patrol in the midday sun wearing combat boots, helmets and armored vests.’

‘Some Iraqis say the soldiers take special pills that keep them cool, but the most common theory is that they have portable air-conditioners–usually said to be placed inside the vests (flak jackets–J.T.), but sometimes placed in the helmet or even the underwear.’

”There is fluid circulating throughout the underwear,’ said Hamid the engineering student. ‘I am not sure of the exact mechanism, but we all know the Americans have very sophisticated technology.”

American ‘GIs are said to be so demoralized that 30 percent of them have already abandoned their posts and paid $600 apiece to escape by an underground railroad to Turkey or Syria.’

‘Others have supposedly converted to Islam and fled to marry women in Saudi Arabia.’

Most disturbing of the urban legends is the one dealing with ‘concealed casualties.’

‘They say Saddam’s alien friends used their bio- engineering to create giant scorpions. There were rumors of these creatures in the as-Zab as-Saghir before the war,’ Mahmoud reported. ‘They say some Americans have been killed by these creatures. The rumor in Fallujah is that the Americans are hiding the casualties by dumping large numbers of soldiers’ bodies each night into the Tigris River.’ (Editor’s Comment: There are also rumors that Saddam and Elvis ride around in a shibriyeh on the back of a giant scorpion. I’ll believe in these cow-sized scorpions when I see a photo of one beside a Humvee. On the other hand, the Pentagon has been known to deep-six unwelcome casualties before. In May 1944, the U.S. Army buried 3,000 men in unmarked graves in southern England. The men were casualties of the ill-fated Exercise Tiger, a rehearsal for D-Day.)

Iraqi teenagers have taken a liking to the GI sunglasses. ‘Like Zahra Thaer, 13. She was walking down a sidewalk in Baghdad wearing a new pair of wraparound sunglasses.’

”These are the latest style,’ she said, explaining that she had been lucky to get one of the last pairs left in the store.’

‘Did she believe the soldiers’ glasses gave them X- ray vision?’

”I am not so sure about their sunglasses,’ she said, ‘But I know about the helmet. Inside each helmet is a map showing the soldier the location of every house in Iraq. My friends at school told me about it.”

(See Atlantis Rising No. 41 for September/October 2003, ‘The Exopolitical Factor,’ pages 28, 30 and 64. Also the Duluth, Minn. News-Tribune for August 8, 2003, ‘Mistrust of U.S. soldiers runs deep–right down to the underwear,’ pages 1A and 12A. Also thanks to Mahmoud al-Diwaniyahi for the additional information.)

November 12th, 2003

somebody out there keeps searching for burger king crowns. Have a ball. ( the photo has a title: gen sedgwick at splitz work place wearing burger king shrek crown)

November 12th, 2003

eye candy
justin wood | portfolio: ‘mazing stuff. “digital/analog fusion art,” sez BoingBoing.

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